Hideously un-diverse

Now here is a funny story.

Celebrity actress Emma Luvee-Dahling has attacked the University of Nairobi for having too many black students.

Ms Luvee-Dahling, famous for starring in 1980s films that no one can remember, complained that her white son had been made to feel completely out of place because most of the students at the university are black. He had such a tough time that his mother instigated a cultural awareness campaign on the university's campus, aimed at promoting racial equality.

During one cultural awareness event, a sympathetic student asked, "What can we do to change the blackness of Nairobi province?"

Ms Luvee-Dahling went on to criticise the students for being racially intolerant and the entire city of Nairobi for being overwhelmingly African.

'Nairobi is very black," she said, "it needs to be cracked open a bit."

A spokesman for the university, while being concerned that the feelings of Ms Luvee-Dahling's son had been hurt, was somewhat at a loss for a solution to the problem. "After all," he said, "we are in Africa and most people here do tend to be black."

He continued, "Perhaps if having more white people around had been so important to him, Ms Luvee-Dahling's son should have applied to a university somewhere else."

(By now, most readers will have realised that this story is completely without foundation and that I have made the whole thing up. After all, even celebrity actresses wouldn't say anything quite that silly, would they?)

Comments

[Jon Gregoey]

Thanks, gave me a laugh.

[Jez]

Well that's the pot calling the kettle...er..black.

I don't know if you've noticed, but almost all British actresses are white! When did you last see a period drama with a black actress in it? Jane Austen? Charles Dickens? All white. This just makes a travesty of our supposedly multi-cultural society. Such hypocrisy. Something must be done.

[Richard]

Jez,

black actors regularly pop in British costume drama. Robin Hood, Oliver Twist etc

[George]

You should write for the Onion.

"Nairobi is very black," she said, "it needs to be cracked open a bit."

A spokesman for the university, while being concerned that the feelings of Ms Luvee-Dahling's son had been hurt, was somewhat at a loss for a solution to the problem. "After all," he said, "we are in Africa and most people here do tend to be black"

Yep, that's definitely Onion-worthy